FRIEND. I am soooooo honored that I got to guest post in this amazing space you've created and curated. And soooooo grateful for you leading the way in deconstructing toxic systems and making weird protest-y subversive fun shit. Plus also, not gonna lie, I needed this money today (but would write for you for freeeeeee). Love you dearly and I'm so fucking happy you're in the world!!
I relate so hard to being almost fifty and out of fucks. When I was a campus minister, I said fuck all the time as a pastoral care tool. Now as a therapist I do it too if I have a client who apologizes for cussing.
I cannot tell you how much this fucking resonates (and delights), Marla, but WOW. I will say that I didn't say fuck until I was 33, sitting in my therapist's office, and she literally coached me as I tried to get it out above a whisper. And now, I agree, it's my favorite curse word, for all the reasons you so wonderfully named.... Thank you.
If you see any you like on my IG feed, let me know. I don't sell them since they're not my illustrations but you can have one for $1 to cover stamp/envelope or multiple pieces for a donation to my Art Supplies Fund. (and thank you!!)
Love this! Thank you for such a fun and relatable read, Marla! Saying fuck IS cathartic. There must be something about my face even 18 years after deconstruction that leads others to think I don't swear. They almost ALWAYS apologize to me for it, but in new situations, it just helps me find my people! Or, those who could be, anyway.
If they only heard me at home...
I STILL struggle with "fart" though, so something of my mom remains! 🤣
Here for the fucks and for letting others be—thanks for writing! ❤️✨ I, too, have taken to wearing my values on my tshirts here in midlife—today’s is “Be the reason someone knows their inner experience matters.”
I love this!! Thanks for bringing Marla to us, D.L. And Marla - it made me smile to see you're living this post-give-a-fuck life in South Carolina too ;) Need as much solidarity as we can get in this wack-ass state!! I'll give you a follow on IG.
SOLIDARITY, new friend!! I've only been in SC for 5 years (but it's been 5 of the worst in recent history obviously lol) I'll follow you back! Thanks for reading!!
Yay! I'm not from here either (I was born & raised upper midwest) but my hubs is from SC and his climate won out over the nasty winters. We've been back here 12 years now and let me tell you SC hits different in 2025 than it did in 2013 UGH
It's tough because this time of year in the Southeast is NASTY. I hate the extreme humidity + heat so much. But the length & severity of an Upper Midwestern winter is, I guess, even worse. So I grin & bear it now......only to enjoy a nice LONG fall & an easy, "cute" winter ;)
I have a Gerald (from Gerald and Piggie books) "fuck" on my bookshelf (that I got at DL's art show in Gresham this spring) displayed next to other wonderful things. My 8 year old (who adores the books) was recently in here chatting with me and as he was about to leave, he noticed the card and exclaimed, "WHAT? Why is Gerald saying that?!?" It was so funny. We laughed and laughed. Thank you thank you, Marla.
I have this wicked little desire to sneak into my parents' home and paste them up everywhere. OR, even better, turn a bunch of them into a bunting that I can string up in my yard for my birthday party at the end of September, and make sure to invite my parents to the party (insert heart eyes emoji here)
Goodness I loved this. Thank you Marla. I came to know your writing while you were still on the field (so was I) and I can’t quite put into words the absolute joy I feel reading your writing here and witnessing your blooming over the last few years. I love your poetry and most recent book.
And thank you DL for this amazing space. ✨Fan-fucking-tastic ✨
I watched Hook with my kids for the first time this summer and gleefully let them watch the entire food fight scene with all the “fart” “butt” “scab” insults flying 🤣🤣 my parents would’ve been horrified! lol.
Love seeing Grover every morning with his overstimulated, angsty FUCK 💙🩵 brings me so much joy
My mom would always fast forward through a scene where the lost boys have an imaginary food fight because they took turns slinging crass insults 🤣 my kids just really have no idea how good they have it! lol!
That's hilarious. Reminds me of watching North and South with my dad and he'd stand in front of the TV during the sex scenes. (one of the most adult things I ever watched when I was young)
Hilarious about not being able to say fart! 😅 I’m am currently in my cursing era and possibly swear a bit more than I’d like, but I’m sure I’ll find my balance at some point. After decades of not cursing, I’ve got a lot to make up for.
FRIEND. I am soooooo honored that I got to guest post in this amazing space you've created and curated. And soooooo grateful for you leading the way in deconstructing toxic systems and making weird protest-y subversive fun shit. Plus also, not gonna lie, I needed this money today (but would write for you for freeeeeee). Love you dearly and I'm so fucking happy you're in the world!!
Marla is THE best. 🩷
Awwww thank you, friend! 🩵
I relate so hard to being almost fifty and out of fucks. When I was a campus minister, I said fuck all the time as a pastoral care tool. Now as a therapist I do it too if I have a client who apologizes for cussing.
I love this! Cussing is seriously so cathartic.
I cannot tell you how much this fucking resonates (and delights), Marla, but WOW. I will say that I didn't say fuck until I was 33, sitting in my therapist's office, and she literally coached me as I tried to get it out above a whisper. And now, I agree, it's my favorite curse word, for all the reasons you so wonderfully named.... Thank you.
Thank you for reading, Phoenix!! 🥰 Kudos to your therapist!
I didn't know that I needed tiny "fuck" collages in my life until right now. Ffffuuuuck! Yes!
Also, loved everything about this essay.
If you see any you like on my IG feed, let me know. I don't sell them since they're not my illustrations but you can have one for $1 to cover stamp/envelope or multiple pieces for a donation to my Art Supplies Fund. (and thank you!!)
This is incredible! I was also forbidden from using the words "butt" and "fart." Three cheers for "fuck"!
Thank you, friend! THREE CHEERS FOR FUCK!!
Love this! Thank you for such a fun and relatable read, Marla! Saying fuck IS cathartic. There must be something about my face even 18 years after deconstruction that leads others to think I don't swear. They almost ALWAYS apologize to me for it, but in new situations, it just helps me find my people! Or, those who could be, anyway.
If they only heard me at home...
I STILL struggle with "fart" though, so something of my mom remains! 🤣
Thanks for reading, Betsy!! I wrote a book called “what makes you fart?” 🩷💨 if you need some help getting over that. 🤣
💯 percent allllll of this sounds so familiar! Cheers to not giving a fuck about the dumb shit anymore!
Cheers to that!!! 🍻
Here for the fucks and for letting others be—thanks for writing! ❤️✨ I, too, have taken to wearing my values on my tshirts here in midlife—today’s is “Be the reason someone knows their inner experience matters.”
Thanks for reading!! Love your tshirt slogan!
I love this!! Thanks for bringing Marla to us, D.L. And Marla - it made me smile to see you're living this post-give-a-fuck life in South Carolina too ;) Need as much solidarity as we can get in this wack-ass state!! I'll give you a follow on IG.
p.s. I requested to follow you on IG but please feel free to ignore it since you're private. xx
SOLIDARITY, new friend!! I've only been in SC for 5 years (but it's been 5 of the worst in recent history obviously lol) I'll follow you back! Thanks for reading!!
Yay! I'm not from here either (I was born & raised upper midwest) but my hubs is from SC and his climate won out over the nasty winters. We've been back here 12 years now and let me tell you SC hits different in 2025 than it did in 2013 UGH
I lived in Ohio for 39 years, Cambodia for 5, now SC for 5. I will never ever ever live somewhere cold again (probably).
It's tough because this time of year in the Southeast is NASTY. I hate the extreme humidity + heat so much. But the length & severity of an Upper Midwestern winter is, I guess, even worse. So I grin & bear it now......only to enjoy a nice LONG fall & an easy, "cute" winter ;)
Co-sign every word of this! 😅
I have a Gerald (from Gerald and Piggie books) "fuck" on my bookshelf (that I got at DL's art show in Gresham this spring) displayed next to other wonderful things. My 8 year old (who adores the books) was recently in here chatting with me and as he was about to leave, he noticed the card and exclaimed, "WHAT? Why is Gerald saying that?!?" It was so funny. We laughed and laughed. Thank you thank you, Marla.
This makes me sooooooooo happy!!! If you need any other characters saying fuck I have a ton. 🤣
I have this wicked little desire to sneak into my parents' home and paste them up everywhere. OR, even better, turn a bunch of them into a bunting that I can string up in my yard for my birthday party at the end of September, and make sure to invite my parents to the party (insert heart eyes emoji here)
I can seriously hook you up with as many as you want. I don’t sell them but I accept donations to my art supplies fund. ☺️ DM me on IG!
Ooh! Okay! Will do later tonight!
Goodness I loved this. Thank you Marla. I came to know your writing while you were still on the field (so was I) and I can’t quite put into words the absolute joy I feel reading your writing here and witnessing your blooming over the last few years. I love your poetry and most recent book.
And thank you DL for this amazing space. ✨Fan-fucking-tastic ✨
THIS MAKES ME SO FUCKING HAPPY. Thank you, Sarah! People I knew back in the day who have evolved/grown along with me are MY FUCKING FAVORITE.
😍
I love this so much!
Thank youuuuuuuuuu!
I watched Hook with my kids for the first time this summer and gleefully let them watch the entire food fight scene with all the “fart” “butt” “scab” insults flying 🤣🤣 my parents would’ve been horrified! lol.
Love seeing Grover every morning with his overstimulated, angsty FUCK 💙🩵 brings me so much joy
I don’t know if I’ve ever seen Hook. Hooray for angsty Grover!! 💙🩵
My mom would always fast forward through a scene where the lost boys have an imaginary food fight because they took turns slinging crass insults 🤣 my kids just really have no idea how good they have it! lol!
That's hilarious. Reminds me of watching North and South with my dad and he'd stand in front of the TV during the sex scenes. (one of the most adult things I ever watched when I was young)
Hilarious about not being able to say fart! 😅 I’m am currently in my cursing era and possibly swear a bit more than I’d like, but I’m sure I’ll find my balance at some point. After decades of not cursing, I’ve got a lot to make up for.
Soooooo much to make up for! I won't be looking for a balance lol.