The Tower is Falling

Pay careful attention to those who are resisting it

Hello friends,

I know my last post was sad (I am still grieving my precious dog Fern) and I still don’t really have a lot to say. We adopted a cat named Checkers and he is such a delight (and reminds me of Fern in many ways) but I am still feeling sad and slow and overwhelmed by the amount of news I am supposed to be able to process every day.

I have been thinking a lot about how a few days before the 2024 election I pulled a tarot card, and I was specifically thinking about who would win. I pulled the tower card and was immediately plunged into a flashback. I felt like a small child again, being told that the world was going to end very, very soon. I felt dread, fear, anxiety, and terror. I hated this feeling, and I put away my tarot cards until several weeks after the election. Like many people, I woke up at 3AM on November 6th and checked my phone and saw the news:

Trump had won the US presidential election. Again.

And I knew nothing would ever be the same.

Of course, the tower of patriarchy falling down is a good thing, ultimately. Once my nervous system feels safe and secure I can see this. But still: being a witness to all the suffering and all the terror being perpetuated in the US against marginalized people has done something to my soul. Even while it breaks apart it is crushing people left and right.

I truly think the tower is falling. I think the Epstein files will reveal previously unknown levels of evil — and point to how the powerful collude together while the rest of us fight and bicker and struggle to survive. This isn’t about political parties, but rather it is about the 1% against the rest of us. We must be prepared to face the truth about power in the United States, and hold everyone accountable. Starting in your family, your church, your city, your state, your favorite actor or writer — and all the way up to our politicians. They are actually making it very easy for us these days. You can simply ask anyone in your life: do you believe in protecting children from predators? And see how they respond. Take careful note if they use any language to protect the powerful people they vote for or tithe to. They are revealing themselves to be unsafe people, and should be treated as such.

It’s been a tough few years for me, but I am proud of the fact that I have faced these hard questions and decisions head-on. I will never forget when Brett Kavanaugh was being nominated for the supreme court and my mother told me she was terrified of “cancel” culture and what it was doing to our society. “What a young man does in college should not impact him the rest of his life” she told me. Instead of brushing off her remarks I let them settle in my bones. I wondered how many men she knew personally who had abused and exploited others, and how evangelical Christianity gave them a chance to start over without ever being held accountable. I didn’t brush off her remarks but I took them seriously. Deadly seriously, for I had one more piece of information letting me know that she would choose the patriarchy over me, every time.

The people who have chosen the tower of patriarchy are revealing themselves right now, right in this very moment. They are the ones making cases that 15 year olds are different from 5 year olds when it comes to sexual abuse, that ICE agents should be able to terrorize and kidnap non-white people, that trans people should have no rights. They are the ones making excuses for abuse, over and over and over again.

I say let them. Ask them how they feel about the United States government right now, and take careful note of what they say. Because when the tower falls, we will need to know who wants to rebuild the patriarchy, and who wants to live in a better world for us all. We will need to know who we can trust with our children and who we cannot. We will need to know who wants to protect the earth and who wants to exploit it. We will need to know who wants to nurture communities and mutual aid, and who wants to extract resources from the 99%.

Once the tower fully collapses, what will we do? I have no real idea. But for today, I am preparing my body, my nervous system, and my soul for what is coming. For what is revealed will be horrifying, and it will be hard for so many people to face. But once you do, you can move towards building up something better.

For me, I will continue to invest in my STRONGWILLED project, helping folks understand the history and long-term impacts of religious authoritarian parenting methods (both on individuals and society as a whole). I will continue to write and educate people about pedophiles and how they are rampant in Christian spaces. And I will continue the long, slow work of grieving my past and my present while also dreaming and manifesting a better tomorrow. One where children are nurtured instead of hit in the name of god. One where abusers are held accountable. One where the earth and all who live on it are nourished instead of exploited. One where every single person has access to food, shelter, healthcare, and education. Basic human rights for all shouldn’t be such a controversial position. But it is to the patriarchy, and it is this basic desire for all creatures to be treated decently that will eventually bring the tower crashing down.

Take care of yourselves as best you can these days, and let me know: how are you taking care of yourselves during this time of unveiling? How are you nurturing your desires for a better world as we survive the ending of this one? How are you taking care of your physical body these days?

Thank you so much to everyone who supports my work and my writing. One of the best ways you can support me is by supporting STRONGWILLED on Patreon. Plus, if you sign up now you will get some great bonus podcast episodes (including one being released soon on how to navigate the holidays during these stressful times).